The new rules of my world

My life has slowly declined since January. It bumped up a bit in the end of January, yet fell again after valentines day.

thats when my life went downhill

i am currently single and it seems like i always will be and i am giving up on love... Permanently

i have friends. they are amazing but they can never fill this lonely hole.

Im locked in a room with no windows. and no doors. ive been locked in forever.

you see the smile that can come up at will?? the mask i can wear to hide the pain?

its breaking...fraying at the edges

the sword is mightier than the heart. the knife stronger than the skin. In the end we are all defeated and eaten by something

the shadows grow longer then disappear forever.

the moon no longer casts her lovely glow

upon my blood splayed planet



IM DYING alone

and the one who caused this lives

dont look at me

I dont want you to see me like this

look in the mirror and see me by your side.

with you laying against me

midnight sandwiches., i had three

my dreams were shattered

and i was left here all alone.

and now you have moved on

you lied to me

and i hope it kills you

i curse you

and i curse your love

may it turn to hate and pain

and more pain

and physical

may your stomach burn with its own acid

and may your heart bleed out

may your nightmares become darker and the sky turn red

may your clouds rain poison and may your moons rays burn your flesh

your soul is rotting in me hand

and you brought this to yourself



I thought i had found love

and it left me

i thought i had found it again.

and it once again left me.

for even less



the black god will someday welcome me

as i am his priest

may his messengers

bring you too me

tattered and left alone

for what you have you cannot bring with you

i would save you.

but you wont ask.

and i wont offer





the black god and his queen

his prince

his son and priest

`````````````````````````````````````````
and now a poem




Ive called out for you

ive told you the truth

there is nothing that i can do

and the pain will not leave me

even now i can feel the physical pain

my heart is breaking in my chest

and the shards are leaking out my eyes

Ive called out

and you turned away

the truth must have hurt you

because now you wont even say a word

you've moved on

that i can see

i hope it was worth

my soul

`````````````````````````````````````````

when the wind blows into my face

i swear i can smell your breath

and when the sky is dark

i see your eyes in the stars

you may not have loved me

but i loved you

i left your name on the moon

and carved into my heart

hoping you would return

but now you are just on the list

your remains on my arm

the end

the bloody heart

bleeding into my hand

and i wont dare move

because i intend to hurt you

not your body

but your soul will rot

If it kills me

then at least ill still be with the black god and his queen.